I took a course on feminism in the political science department of UFV almost 2 years ago. At the time, I felt I had a firm grasp on the ins and outs of the term. We studied Liberal feminism, radical feminism, anti-racist and post-colonial feminisms, Marxist feminisms, Indigenous feminisms and male feminisms as "centers" of feminist and gender politics. We also studied the "category of woman" including questions of commonality, of difference, of identity and intersectionality. It was a pretty thorough study.
However, after the theoretical course ended, I began bumping up against "feminist" ideals in the real world.
Most notably, while attending the BC Association of Social Worker's (BCASW) annual conference, I listened to a speaker who operates a woman's shelter,
Vancouver Rape Relief Society. The first year I heard her speak was during a plenary titled, "Where's the Harm", which discussed Canadian prostitution laws and the two Constitutional challenges to these laws. Her perspective here was that women were forced into prostitution because of social, cultural and financial marginalization; women didn't have a real choice. However, men who purchased these women's sexual services DID have a choice, and they were making the wrong choice. At the end of the talk, I felt very disempowered, because I felt that men were the "bad" guys, this was a war, and I'd better choose the "right" side to be on for the duration.
The second year was a plenary titled "A Master Class in Advocacy" and this same speaker decided it was a good idea to shame social workers for not doing enough to help marginalized people, especially her clients. She felt there was no point in negotiating with government, and that she was perfectly entitled to flout the law. Social workers were "the privileged" and had better start sending personal donations to women's organizations, because Stephen Harper has quietly cut most of their funding.
Other "real world" encounters with feminism include that whole "Sarah Palin is a feminist" debacle. Um, yeah, okay Sarah, if you say so... Another was at an ethics committee meeting for people, mostly social workers, employed in elder care. A woman who works for the Alzheimer's Society talked about a Muslim woman she saw in her community (in the Greater Vancouver area) who was wearing a veil. This woman felt the Muslim woman was
oppressed by the veil, as if she couldn't possibly have chosen this garment on her own.
But really,
my brand of feminism
does say that if you call yourself a feminist, then you
are a feminist - no policing the boundaries of the feminist politic. No one gets to be the expert, no one gets to say, "no, you're NOT a feminist!"
My brand of feminism foregrounds individual experiences over theory. My brand of feminism is interested in being inclusive, in solidarity movements, in forming alliances. It's about action. It's sometimes called "third wave" feminism, but sometimes it rejects such labels, reminding us that there
never has been a cohesive woman's movement! Even the second wave movement in the US in the 60's was about middle class women and their rights, not about the rights of Black women or Indigenous women or disabled women, etc...
Regardless, feminism seems to have a bad rap these days. Often, "third wavers" prefer to think of themselves as a part of a post-feminist world, and to think of feminism as "the F word". In some ways, I can understand this, such as when it's a reaction to the "war between the sexes". I don't want to fight against men; I have 2 sons, and they are the most important people on the planet to me. Then again, I'm mystified and horrified by gendered violence, by the patriarchal dynamics of power and control that play out in intimate partner violence. How do our sweet boy children become these 'batterers'? How are they led to believe that it's okay to control their wife or girlfriend through intimidation and fear? When I think of the violence committed against Muslim women by their governments in oppressive countries, I feel devastated and helpless. How can feminism ever hope to stand against such willful aggression?
It can't. We can't "divide and conquer" when it comes to such beliefs about intimate relationships. We have to work together, in partnership, without vilifying one another.
Still, it is important that feminism stay vital and relevant, because there is a great deal that needs to shift about women's roles in Western Society. Why is it okay that mothers are judged by much harsher standards than men?
I see this a lot in my studies to become a child protection social worker. We talk about "mother blaming" a lot. Especially in the rhetoric of violence against women - a woman who chooses to stay with an abusive partner is "unwilling" to keep her children safe, and may have them removed. Of course, intimate partner violence has a devastating impact on children, but mothers are not the only ones responsible for children's safety. The husband, the partner, the father, also has a significant role to play, especially if he is the perpetrator. Why is being a "bad mother" so much more stigmatic than being a "deadbeat dad"?
