So lately I've been thinking about adoption and abortion, mostly in reaction to a few posts from Kim, the inadvertent farmer. It started with this post on the stillbirth of her twin daughters, continued with this post celebrating adoption, and culminated in this post advocating for adoption over abortion. I felt inclined to comment on the last post. It was a very lengthy comment, practically a blog post in itself. I think the main thing that bothered me was the implication that women who choose abortion over adoption are somehow being selfish.
I can, of course, understand Kim's point of view in advocating for adoption, however, I can also understand many women's need to avoid the shame and social stigma of an unplanned pregnancy. I have a problem with the idea that it is a woman's mistake, her poor judgment, that has put her in this position. As an unapologetic feminist, I need to say that men must be equally implicated. Further, I need to say that it is unlikely that women will choose adoption over abortion while our society continues to shame them.
I think that what's important to me in all this, is that there are children available for adoption, but they're not all babies. Sometimes they have special needs. Lots of them have been through the child protection system. However, the focus on advocating for adoption was to compare it to abortion, thus, on newborn babies. And the focus in the comments was on unplanned pregnancies and shame.
But what about adopting a 7 year old who has been permanently removed from her parent's care? What about 5 kids, aged 10 through 3? What about the 2 kids with FAS? Who wants to adopt them? Some people do, but not as many as those who want babies.
I just think advocating for adoption is more than advocating against abortion.
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